Beach and Cruise Apparel and Accessories

Frequently asked questions

We know you’re excited to wear your new attitude, but good snark takes time. Most orders ship within 3–5 business days. Once it’s out the door, you’ll get a tracking number so you can stalk your package like an ex on social media.

We will work quickly to ship your order as soon as possible. Once your order has shipped, you will receive an email with further information. Delivery times vary depending on your location.

Look, we move fast. Once an order is in the system, it’s usually already being prepped. If you caught a typo or realized you ordered a Small when you’re definitely a Large, email us immediately. If it’s already printed, you’re stuck with a very nice gift for a friend.

We want you to love your gear. If your item arrives damaged or the print is wonky (human error is real), we’ll make it right. However, if you just changed your mind or your cat didn't approve of the slogan, we generally don’t offer returns. Check the size charts twice; buy once.

Currently, we are keeping the snark domestic (USA only). We’re working on spreading the salt globally, so stay tuned.

Unless you want your shirt to fit your toddler, wash it in cold water, inside out, and tumble dry on low. Don’t iron the design. Just... don't.

Yes. We aren't monsters. We use premium fabrics because you should be comfortable while you're being judgmental.

Got a line that’s too good not to be on a shirt? Hit us up on our contact page. If we use it, we might even send you one for free (if we're in a good mood).

Because life is too short for boring clothes and fake politeness. We’re here to help you say what everyone else is thinking.

© 2026 Salt and Snark, Powered by Shopify - All rights reserved, though we’re not sure why you’d want them.

Our products are intended for adults with a sense of humor and a low tolerance for stupidity. If you are offended by our designs, please consult a mirror to find the source of the problem. We are not responsible for your lack of friends, your cold coffee, or any HR meetings resulting from wearing our shirts to work. Use at your own risk. Or don’t. We own everything on this site. Don’t steal our stuff; it’s tacky and we’re pettier than you are.